the india diaries
feeling bad for a lack of devotion, feeling sick & cold and miserly, done in by the poverty & stench…everybody claps & oohs & ahs coz the karmarpa says a few verses in english…jesus. we’ve been chanting tibetan all day…maybe coz my play didn’t get into prague is the reason why i feel shit…all the usual feelings of failure, and maybe just not being good enough. but for what?
already growing immune to the little beggars and the creatures crawling in the dirt on their spindly legs…suffering all around. why not me too? –
even the money changers who presumably change 100 rupees into 90 coins (for the beggars) have been cheating me, and i discover that all along they’ve only been giving me 60. stealing rupees which were going to the fucking poorest…
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