mom
I’m sitting in the sun socializing with friends, braaing on a Sunday afternoon. My daughter is playing with two other girls, slightly older than her. They are excluding her from their games. She tries hard to get their attention, first by being mean and when she see’s that doesn’t work, she tries all kinds of methods to fit into the two girls’ “circle”. I’m tripping out on space cake, observing this very carefully. Ultimately I can interfere but would the learning process not be more effective without my involvement? Then the scene just sort of freezes: two girls sitting on a blanket on the grass, playing with little plastic tea cups and saucers and my daughter, the third girl, standing about a metre away in the shadow of the umbrella, for that moment just staring into nothing.
Beautiful, beautiful outsider, standing in an orange dress and curls, shining in the sun. The light is turning into that rich melancholic yellow that only happens on Sunday afternoons as the weekend fades. I feel breathless, as if someone tore out my heart, ready to put on that braai.
How it kills me sometimes.
June 2nd, 2009 at 5:53 am
wow